I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
