When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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