Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Life without a bra equals bliss.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize