is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
