He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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