sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
