We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Randomize
