it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
