He is such a slut. More and more my type.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
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