some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize