Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
