Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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