Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
