And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
