Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
