Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Gay?
German.
Pity.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
