Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
