Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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