Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
