Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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