the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize