there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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