Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
