You smell like a Billy Joel song
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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