Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
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