i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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