i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
