girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
