it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
