So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
