im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
