Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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