Midget sex pt 2 tonight
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
