I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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