If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
