Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
