That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize