Me too!
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
