How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
