he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
