Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
