loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize