I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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