she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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