Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
