I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I don't think brook has ever known best
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
