i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
