The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
