Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
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