they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
