In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
