didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
