Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
